3rd day..=")

2nd day of accepting what she wants, yesterday was one of those days i get to calm myself. I didn't on msn, and I only turn on my facebook for the moment only.. I sat at my balcony, for like an hour or 2... just trying to calm myself, and asking whether how could this happen?.. and why am I being like this?.. why am I trembling, why am I shaking.. Later on, she called me.. and she wanted to talk, and all things happen back again.. the trembling and the shaking, told me that she wanted freedom that's all, and she'll continue this relationship, but is there gonna be trust? it might be difficult for anyone to have trust, but I may be a fool, no matter how much I told myself it's not worth it, I just can't stop loving her. I asked her one question, where she went on monday night, and I promised not to ask where she is anymore.
and she told me that she went out with a guy.. I was pretty down, really feel like breaking down big time. But what can I do but to just accept what she wants..

I talked to my brother last night, and he told me his experience in life. I kinda accept it, cause I know what I'm doing now is foolish. but i'll try to accept it soon.. not now, cause it's hard for me to just do sudden changes. Maybe later on...

I had lots of advices from many people, saying its easy.. but doing it is another thing, everyone knows that, and i thank everyone advising me all this time, I just need time to change.
I hope that this relationship works, I'm trying something new, I haven't tried it before.. and it's kinda hard for me to change.. I don't even know what I'm saying right now..

I just wanna get thru time..